Well, I finally had the much-awaited MRI scan, and received the prelim. diagnosis from the radiologist. Nothing definite yet, because I now have to have another normal x-ray, and then a second MRI using a dye contrast in the blood and focussed on the area that is causing the problem - today's MRI was to try and locate the problematic region.
Next step is an x-ray at my orthopaedic specialist's and consultaion with him on 7th January, and thereafter the second MRI.
From what can be gleaned thus far, there is either a malformation of the femoral head (top of the femur) where it enters the hip socket, or, indeed, a stress fracture of the femoral neck. This is not definite yet, however. Both can cause a lot of pain, and result in crippling disabilities later on in life (considering that I am 51, "later on in life" can be any time now). The x-ray will determine if osteoarthritis has set in already; the second MRI to determine if it's the head or neck. We didn't even discuss treatment, as that will be done with the specialist on 7th January. Oddly enough, I may keep running, but should stop as soon as any pain starts - that's weird, because while I am running, there is no pain, but afterwards, it sets in with a vengeance. From what I have read in my "Boy's Book of Crippling Injuries", treatment is from moderate to extreme, and can result in a cessation of running. This sickens me to the very core - I finally found in life a sport for which I have an absolute passion, and now this!!!! Shit!!!!I KNOW the final diagnosis is yet to come, but what else can it be?
Sounds to the contrary, but I am trying not to be too pessimistic about it, and yet, at the same time, realistic. I have a pounding headache, and my guts feel like a boot has just been thrust into them. All I want to do is be able to run, and complete the Marathon des Sables in 2010. Surely that's not too much to ask???
2007 was one of the worst years of my life in many ways; I was hoping for a much better 2008, with running as a major positive factor in my life. One wonders now, what it will end up like. Some of the things that happened in 2007, included a shoulder operation (the result of a skiing accident two years ago - I broke my collar bone when a snow-boarder went over my skis and I did a somersault through the air, and landed on my left shoulder - even the ensuing helicopter flight to the hospital didn't compensate for the extreme pain I felt!!!!), and an operation to remove the bursa from my right elbow after I had a mountain bike accident, which, ironically, took place right in before the surgeon who operated on my shoulder!!!!!! There were also lots of relationship problems, and my own psychological hassles I had to try and sort through and confront. It was just a shitty year - the saving grace was my running.
Sounds like "Poor, poor me" - that's not the case, but I just feel a slight amount of devastation at the moment, and can hardly wait 'til 7th January - why do bloody doctors have to go on holiday???????? To top it all, we were woken at 2:30 a.m. with a bloody death case (which, as it turned out, could have waited until this morning), so I feel even worse than I would have otherwise. I'm also reading the new book on the Marathon des Sables by David Hine (I think that's right), and have started wondering if I'll ever be able to do it.
Shit, bugger, shit, phuque. This is not a happy bunny in the Alps right now. Almost feel like going for a 20-km run later, just to take it out on my leg. I'll calm down soon, but I needed to get this off my chest in a place where people understand the frustrations and worries I have - running has become one of the most important parts of my life, and it TERRIFIES me, that it might be taken away from me.
So, I need to get back to death work. I should count my blessings - at least I am alive.
More later, after a couple of Valium
Cheers,
Craig almost on crutches
Next step is an x-ray at my orthopaedic specialist's and consultaion with him on 7th January, and thereafter the second MRI.
From what can be gleaned thus far, there is either a malformation of the femoral head (top of the femur) where it enters the hip socket, or, indeed, a stress fracture of the femoral neck. This is not definite yet, however. Both can cause a lot of pain, and result in crippling disabilities later on in life (considering that I am 51, "later on in life" can be any time now). The x-ray will determine if osteoarthritis has set in already; the second MRI to determine if it's the head or neck. We didn't even discuss treatment, as that will be done with the specialist on 7th January. Oddly enough, I may keep running, but should stop as soon as any pain starts - that's weird, because while I am running, there is no pain, but afterwards, it sets in with a vengeance. From what I have read in my "Boy's Book of Crippling Injuries", treatment is from moderate to extreme, and can result in a cessation of running. This sickens me to the very core - I finally found in life a sport for which I have an absolute passion, and now this!!!! Shit!!!!I KNOW the final diagnosis is yet to come, but what else can it be?
Sounds to the contrary, but I am trying not to be too pessimistic about it, and yet, at the same time, realistic. I have a pounding headache, and my guts feel like a boot has just been thrust into them. All I want to do is be able to run, and complete the Marathon des Sables in 2010. Surely that's not too much to ask???
2007 was one of the worst years of my life in many ways; I was hoping for a much better 2008, with running as a major positive factor in my life. One wonders now, what it will end up like. Some of the things that happened in 2007, included a shoulder operation (the result of a skiing accident two years ago - I broke my collar bone when a snow-boarder went over my skis and I did a somersault through the air, and landed on my left shoulder - even the ensuing helicopter flight to the hospital didn't compensate for the extreme pain I felt!!!!), and an operation to remove the bursa from my right elbow after I had a mountain bike accident, which, ironically, took place right in before the surgeon who operated on my shoulder!!!!!! There were also lots of relationship problems, and my own psychological hassles I had to try and sort through and confront. It was just a shitty year - the saving grace was my running.
Sounds like "Poor, poor me" - that's not the case, but I just feel a slight amount of devastation at the moment, and can hardly wait 'til 7th January - why do bloody doctors have to go on holiday???????? To top it all, we were woken at 2:30 a.m. with a bloody death case (which, as it turned out, could have waited until this morning), so I feel even worse than I would have otherwise. I'm also reading the new book on the Marathon des Sables by David Hine (I think that's right), and have started wondering if I'll ever be able to do it.
Shit, bugger, shit, phuque. This is not a happy bunny in the Alps right now. Almost feel like going for a 20-km run later, just to take it out on my leg. I'll calm down soon, but I needed to get this off my chest in a place where people understand the frustrations and worries I have - running has become one of the most important parts of my life, and it TERRIFIES me, that it might be taken away from me.
So, I need to get back to death work. I should count my blessings - at least I am alive.
More later, after a couple of Valium
Cheers,
Craig almost on crutches
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